For three months I have been incredibly inactive. After being put in a walking boot for the second time within a one year period I had to be deemed handicap to get around my college campus. I used this excuse to stop being active all together. I told myself if a doctor told me I couldn't walk, then why do anything at all. Well reality started to catch up with me. Between doctor visits and weighing myself on my own time I realized I had gained around 60-70 pounds since coming to college. 30 of which I gained since being in the boot. That's an average of 10 pounds a month. I knew then that something had to change but I'm not the best at convincing myself not to stop in what I call the "Bad for Bina isle" at the grocery store. Between Little Debbie and Hostess this isle could truly be the death of me.
Recently my mom and I had decided it was time to move most of my doctors to Columbia so I could actually see them while I was here at college, especially after a less than stellar upper respiratory infection. I made my way to the eye doctor, general doctor and an allergist. I never thought that the allergist would be the one to make me realize things needed to change. After a long question and answer portion of my visit, she finally broke it down for me. My weight could be affecting, and most likely was affecting my all around health in multiple places. My asthma, allergies, poly-cystic ovarian syndrome, skin problems and anemia all could be centered around poor food choices and lack of activity. At first I didn't fully understand. She wanted me to cut out all sugars, milk and gluten. I didn't understand how wheat and milk, two things I had been told my whole life were food for me were no longer good. But, I took the challenge head on.
After about five days of this diet, my whole body felt better. I was sleeping soundly, breathing easier and no longer had digestive issues. But, I was feeling the stress of not knowing what I should eat at all. I made a decision to bring wheat back into my diet and things got bad again. Digestive and neurological... I finally broke down and looked into what exactly a gluten intolerance would look and feel like and I was pretty surprised about what I found. This is the article I read: 10 Signs You're Gluten Intolerant
I found out that not only my digestive issues may be the symptom of this new found "allergy" but also possibly my skin problems, fatigue, PCOS, migraines, joint problems, depression and anxiety. I was a tad shocked and worried at this. Although there is no clear cut way to tell if all of these are due to this, it could very well be that some are. Now I'm torn between taking it out or dealing with it like I have since well.. forever.
Today I woke up and realized that although changing my diet could make me feel better inside it won't help fully change everything I'm experiencing. A lot of my depression and anxiety comes from me not feeling happy with how I look and feel. I'm self conscious. But, then I turn to food to make me feel better even though in the long run that's making it worse. So, I made a deal with myself. I would figure out the diet thing as I go, but I can start improving my activity. I got up from the couch, got dressed, walked to my apartment complex's gym and jumped on the treadmill.
Although I only ran at a 3.5 mph pace for 10 minutes, it felt great. My legs shook a little and my muscles were definitely confused, but I did it. I did a few weights, something I've always been good at then left. I didn't do more than I needed, I didn't work out for an hour or two. I was there for 25 minutes, that's it. It's my first day but everyone has to start somewhere.
I made a pact with myself. Run two to five more minutes than the day before. Stretch everyday. Do a few weights. I'll build up to a goal of 2 miles, then 3 and so on. Eventually, I would love to run a 5k. Then maybe a 10k and keep going. Running is something I have always hated, but come out feeling incredibly accomplished.
I'm one day in but things will get hard. I'll feel gross or tired, but I hope writing about it will keep me motivated.
Today I weigh 280 pounds. With time and a lot of it, I hope to eventually be back under 200.
If you made it this far into this post, thank you for reading. I hope you'll come back and experience this journey with me.
Bina
"The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time." - Abraham Lincoln